It is nothing but an addiction to nicotine. Allen Carr’s method can help.
Take advice from real people who have stopped smoking. Don’t listen to those who tell you to eat sweets or use nicotine patches if they’ve not smoked a single cigarette ever!
Naively assumed that the intense sorrow would vanish after a while… So a year isn’t “a while”? Fine. Absolutely did not expect my tear ducts to be that productive after so many months. Is that why I’m thirsty all the time?!
A year ago, my heart broke when my love left without saying goodbye. I have never ever experienced such agony and grief. Twelve months later, it is still fucking painful. 💔💔💔💔💔
I admit that I had on several occasions thought of “ending it all”. Obviously I didn’t. And I won’t. I went to a counsellor. I used up so much tissue paper during the first session, I felt so paiseh and brought my own subsequently. Haha.
I don’t think I’m quite the same person I was a year ago. I’m not really sure who or what can make me happy again. I’m not very concerned that speeding or tailgating could lead to a crash. I’m not anxious if all that alcohol will damage my liver, or if all that junk food will clog my arteries. I’m really just worried there isn’t an Afterlife, and that I’ll never see my love again.
I don’t know what the future has in store, but right here, right now, I am still fucking inconsolable.
In Luodong for the first anniversary rituals. I guess I’ll be here again and again and again and again, until I’m too old to travel, or when I can enter and leave the columbarium with dry eyes — whichever is earlier.
I miss you so, my love. 😭😭😭😭😭